I am such an emotional creature. Even when I was little. If upset or scared, I could literally get sick. I remember being in a talent show when I was in Girl Scouts, and we were doing a fashion show of clothes we had sewn. Oh, I had the grooviest maxi skirt you could have ever seen and the coolest crocheted poncho. We practiced walking on stage. That's when it hit, all those people out there watching. I was puking a short time later! Arggg!
In my teen years I remember doing the same thing. Mostly fear from having to stand up in front of people. A breakup with a boyfriend. Typical teenage stuff.
And later years, the crisis of a marriage falling apart, sent me in a down spin. Leaving me sick and puny with a case of shingles that still to this day reminds me where they once were. What on earth!
And here I am again. So much going on with responsibilities of taking care of sick mother-in-law, selling her property, worrying about how long her money will last, all while trying to figure out how to keep a husband from being in total denial. It is draining mentally and physically. Then on top of it all I keep dreaming of "what I want to do when I grow up". I am pretty sure I am not doing it. I want to design crochet and knitting patterns, maybe own a little thrift shop...but it is so scary. And all this denial has made me totally unorganized and frazzled. So this year, I am going to try and get my foot in the proverbial door. Yes, at 51, I know in my heart that I need to give it a try. I may fall on my face, but I am pretty sure if I do I will get back up.
So, like so many, I need to declutter. I mean seriously declutter. I have yarn everywhere. Things I have started. Things I want to start, and they all seem to have gotten lost in the clutter.
I am hoping my blog can be a source of strength! Some support, and maybe a place to rant a wee bit! LOL!
Christmas was nice. It is fun to see family. I wish there was more time to visit. But I am sure I am not alone on that one!
I got all my Christmas orders done. I had to work on the up until Christmas Eve! Next year I hope this will not be the case!! I learned a lot this December in judging deadlines and custom orders.
That being said, I wanted to share one of those orders. A pretty crocheted shawl!
